From an early marriage and workplace woes to financial mismanagement and now an extra-marital affair, Sonia's life was on fast track but alas, going downhill. Speed and recklessness are exciting; but together, they are fatal. Was she finally getting a freedom she missed ever since she was married? Or, were the suppressed womanly desires of a 25-year old getting an outlet? Lack of dependence when one earns? Was it the training environment without much responsibility that made her footloose? The anonymity of a new city? The charm of Abhilash? The lack of money? Love has always been a chemistry whose ingredients and catalysts have defied a formula.
I called Sonia once after a few days and she did confirm a few of my speculated reasons. Abhilash was a handsome bachelor who did do the things she started missing over time, since marriage. She got the much-desired attention, he did the chivalrous courtesies and the usual wooing rituals. She said they are just good friends and that she just enjoyed his company, nothing more.
"Come on, you wouldn't say "I am in love" when describing just a good friend"
"Believe me Sir. Its just that we like to have coffee together, we like to talk and have meals together in office. He is getting married next year too. And, I am here just another 2 weeks and then its all over as it is. As for I love you, I say that to my hundred friends on facebook" she chuckled.
"OK. I am not your conscience keeper. So I trust you and I am sure you are in control of your life.It's your life." I shrugged.
"Yes, sir. Let us not talk about it." her tone was rather like the Johnny Johnny saying Yes Papa. But there wasn't to be Hahaha when "open your mouth" was to shortly happen.
I looked up Abhilash's profile on facebook. He seemed a Casanova given his popularity with the better sex. Sonia has a serious problem judging men, I thought to myself. And that she lives in a shell, cut off from any friends and also detached from her family and roots, thereby she gets no sane advice too as also the same reason starves her of social support in crisis. Or was it that her beauty attracted problems. I was reminded of the freakonomics of dumb blondes where beauty's game theoretic dynamics ensure dumbness. She didn't have close friends and possibly Neeraj never wanted that as well, nor did she try selflessly for one and nor jealous girls came near her. Her beauty made sure she attracted men and her dumbness made sure she attracted wrong ones. She was to prove her susceptibility and self-destructive trait once more later, thrice in a short time I knew her.
I drew Sonia's attention to Abhilash's page on facebook. She surprised me with an alternate view, "Yes. He is very popular but he is not serious about them." I felt like a fool wondering why I forgot my decision to "Stay Away" from a "Royal Mess". I got busy with my life leaving Sonia in her paradise. Fool's paradise.
Sonia mailed me her pictures with Abhilash on a weekend trip from Mumbai to Lonavala. By now I could just pray that she returns back to Neeraj and her earlier life, however unhappy that life was, before any storm strikes.
Sonia got busy with her life on her return. Two months passed. Sonia called.
"Sir, Would you know someone in Airtel?"
"May be I would. Need to find out. What do you need?"
Silence.
"Say"
"Nothing. Sir, Neeraj suspects me."
"I told you. I knew it would happen. What has actually happened? You left Mumbai 2 months back and he is still there. So, nothing serious I hope."
"Sir, I know you would scold me but I met Abhilash last week when he was on an official trip here."
"Then?"
"Neeraj came to know and is now unnecessarily assuming things and blaming me for things I did not do."
"Aha! Hmmm. Look, I think you are a compulsive liar and I don't trust you at all. Please deal with your life. Why me now if you do not listen when I cautioned you."
"Sir. I will commit suicide."
"Shut up and don't blackmail me. For all I care, go and die. Worry about your parents. You die and all attention would be on your case and all your ugly truth would be out."
She was uncontrollably hysterical for a long time on phone. Possibly my logic on her suicide plan made sense to her and she felt for once in her life, escapism wont work. And that she had to face it. Face the worst phase of her life.
Sonia sobbed and sounded like in ruins. She begged for help and it felt pitiable. I said you need to be honest with complete truth to get any help. She possibly felt she had no other option. She must have died a death when she said all she did and hid from the world so far.
Sonia and Abhilash had sex when they went to Lonavala.
Sonia could not have sex with Neeraj ever since then. She just didn't feel up-to it.
She and Abhilash had close to thousand plus text sms exchanged in just the last month. Her reason for getting a useful contact in Airtel was to get her bills forged and changed. I told her that is next to impossible.
Sonia and Abhilash met in a pub in Gurgaon when he came on an official trip and coincidentally Neeraj's best friend found them necking each other on a couch.
Neeraj went on an evidence gathering spree once his friend narrated to him the story and he had a big fight with Sonia. He even flew to Mumbai and possibly got more evidence.
After that fateful night at Lonavala, Sonia could not resist, or refuse, Abhilash's demands. They made sex once again on office terrace when Abhilash was on his official trip. She was having periods and felt used, but Abhilash would not listen.Sonia felt he just knew too much and had pictures of Lonavla trip that could nail her lies. Abhilash had another affair in due course, with another hottie in office, Sonia was to tell me later.
The last three years went along predictable lines. The royal mess became a royal and messy divorce case with domestic violence and dowry cases running in multiple courts. Sonia got her all loans transferred by court to Neeraj and basic compensation awarded to her in a year and Neeraj's parents had to sell off both cars to pay her back. They actually turned out to be fake millionaires themselves surviving on loans and odd jobs.
When Sonia could not forge her telephone bills, she went from defensive to attack mode. She paid exorbitantly to an agent to pull out Neeraj's call details. To her horror, Neeraj had his own little (or rather big) affair on the sly and matched her thousand by thousand on minutes and smses he exchanged with Anushka, his team junior in office. Sonia was furious at the discovery but how the two had drifted to such state, possibly one could seek an answer only if the chicken and egg riddle is solved.
Sonia changed her lawyers thrice as one was a lecher out to exploit her (she fired him after he called to discuss her case in evening only to be found drunk and talking suggestively) and another sold out his conscience to Neeraj's lawyer. Sonia is now greyed at 28, frequently sick and a shadow of her beautiful self. She has clung on to her job as her only hope to survive, though courts awarded her monthly rent as maintenance. She must have spent close to thousand hours running around in courts. It has been multiple counseling sessions to make her understand every past mistake of hers. She hates men now and is too scared to choose another man for herself. I believe her when she admits that at 28, she has had no sex and no drinks in last three years. Many men in her office made passes at her but most were either not worthy of her or were just interested in sex without committing. She gets anonymous calls often and that scares her to the bone. She is slowly rebuilding her finances but her father's sickness drains her. Over period of time she has picked up her life a bit. She is looking desperately to get a foreign assignment. She has couple of trusted friends she can cal at midnight for help and they would oblige. She is unable to leave her firm and take job elsewhere so far though she is trying as she has strong feeling that Abhilash has shared his 'exploits' with some colleagues. But being past that phase, its not too bad now.
Sonia devotes her time every week to a NGO that provides legal support and advice to suffering women. She is an excellent counselor. It is revealing to see her understanding of financial, legal, marital and social issues now.
And yet, she dumbfounded me last week.
"Sir, i could not control myself from buying that watch for myself."
"How much did it cost you?" I only knew watches tell time though she was dying to tell me the brand.
"15000."
"Fine. May be you can afford it." I was unsure though if she was mistaken with a zero extra in the figure.
"I am feeling guilty now."
"Return it if so."
"After such a long time I bought something."
"But you have your priorities. At least till you settle in life back again and get basic security of home and job."
"I want to re-marry. But there are not enough good men." she lamented. I was amused thinking she wants to marry for being able to shop. She is still the same Sonia. But I was wrong. She did return the watch and became determined to re-marry. She was too frustrated with her past and also dreadfully looked at a post-30 lonely life of many colleagues.
Where are good men for 30 year old girls wanting to marry/re-marry? I had no easy answers even though 'good' meant just 'reasonable' and not a DiCaprio or Hrithik or SRK ....life goes on for Sonia.
Over to my next blog " 30 plus, Single and working" - the cougar phenomenon, the life of Roshni.
(All posts in this blog are based on real-life personalities and events in my life, suitably moderated and anonymized to protect identities.)
I called Sonia once after a few days and she did confirm a few of my speculated reasons. Abhilash was a handsome bachelor who did do the things she started missing over time, since marriage. She got the much-desired attention, he did the chivalrous courtesies and the usual wooing rituals. She said they are just good friends and that she just enjoyed his company, nothing more.
"Come on, you wouldn't say "I am in love" when describing just a good friend"
"Believe me Sir. Its just that we like to have coffee together, we like to talk and have meals together in office. He is getting married next year too. And, I am here just another 2 weeks and then its all over as it is. As for I love you, I say that to my hundred friends on facebook" she chuckled.
"OK. I am not your conscience keeper. So I trust you and I am sure you are in control of your life.It's your life." I shrugged.
"Yes, sir. Let us not talk about it." her tone was rather like the Johnny Johnny saying Yes Papa. But there wasn't to be Hahaha when "open your mouth" was to shortly happen.
I looked up Abhilash's profile on facebook. He seemed a Casanova given his popularity with the better sex. Sonia has a serious problem judging men, I thought to myself. And that she lives in a shell, cut off from any friends and also detached from her family and roots, thereby she gets no sane advice too as also the same reason starves her of social support in crisis. Or was it that her beauty attracted problems. I was reminded of the freakonomics of dumb blondes where beauty's game theoretic dynamics ensure dumbness. She didn't have close friends and possibly Neeraj never wanted that as well, nor did she try selflessly for one and nor jealous girls came near her. Her beauty made sure she attracted men and her dumbness made sure she attracted wrong ones. She was to prove her susceptibility and self-destructive trait once more later, thrice in a short time I knew her.
I drew Sonia's attention to Abhilash's page on facebook. She surprised me with an alternate view, "Yes. He is very popular but he is not serious about them." I felt like a fool wondering why I forgot my decision to "Stay Away" from a "Royal Mess". I got busy with my life leaving Sonia in her paradise. Fool's paradise.
Sonia mailed me her pictures with Abhilash on a weekend trip from Mumbai to Lonavala. By now I could just pray that she returns back to Neeraj and her earlier life, however unhappy that life was, before any storm strikes.
Sonia got busy with her life on her return. Two months passed. Sonia called.
"Sir, Would you know someone in Airtel?"
"May be I would. Need to find out. What do you need?"
Silence.
"Say"
"Nothing. Sir, Neeraj suspects me."
"I told you. I knew it would happen. What has actually happened? You left Mumbai 2 months back and he is still there. So, nothing serious I hope."
"Sir, I know you would scold me but I met Abhilash last week when he was on an official trip here."
"Then?"
"Neeraj came to know and is now unnecessarily assuming things and blaming me for things I did not do."
"Aha! Hmmm. Look, I think you are a compulsive liar and I don't trust you at all. Please deal with your life. Why me now if you do not listen when I cautioned you."
"Sir. I will commit suicide."
"Shut up and don't blackmail me. For all I care, go and die. Worry about your parents. You die and all attention would be on your case and all your ugly truth would be out."
She was uncontrollably hysterical for a long time on phone. Possibly my logic on her suicide plan made sense to her and she felt for once in her life, escapism wont work. And that she had to face it. Face the worst phase of her life.
Sonia sobbed and sounded like in ruins. She begged for help and it felt pitiable. I said you need to be honest with complete truth to get any help. She possibly felt she had no other option. She must have died a death when she said all she did and hid from the world so far.
Sonia and Abhilash had sex when they went to Lonavala.
Sonia could not have sex with Neeraj ever since then. She just didn't feel up-to it.
She and Abhilash had close to thousand plus text sms exchanged in just the last month. Her reason for getting a useful contact in Airtel was to get her bills forged and changed. I told her that is next to impossible.
Sonia and Abhilash met in a pub in Gurgaon when he came on an official trip and coincidentally Neeraj's best friend found them necking each other on a couch.
Neeraj went on an evidence gathering spree once his friend narrated to him the story and he had a big fight with Sonia. He even flew to Mumbai and possibly got more evidence.
After that fateful night at Lonavala, Sonia could not resist, or refuse, Abhilash's demands. They made sex once again on office terrace when Abhilash was on his official trip. She was having periods and felt used, but Abhilash would not listen.Sonia felt he just knew too much and had pictures of Lonavla trip that could nail her lies. Abhilash had another affair in due course, with another hottie in office, Sonia was to tell me later.
The last three years went along predictable lines. The royal mess became a royal and messy divorce case with domestic violence and dowry cases running in multiple courts. Sonia got her all loans transferred by court to Neeraj and basic compensation awarded to her in a year and Neeraj's parents had to sell off both cars to pay her back. They actually turned out to be fake millionaires themselves surviving on loans and odd jobs.
When Sonia could not forge her telephone bills, she went from defensive to attack mode. She paid exorbitantly to an agent to pull out Neeraj's call details. To her horror, Neeraj had his own little (or rather big) affair on the sly and matched her thousand by thousand on minutes and smses he exchanged with Anushka, his team junior in office. Sonia was furious at the discovery but how the two had drifted to such state, possibly one could seek an answer only if the chicken and egg riddle is solved.
Sonia changed her lawyers thrice as one was a lecher out to exploit her (she fired him after he called to discuss her case in evening only to be found drunk and talking suggestively) and another sold out his conscience to Neeraj's lawyer. Sonia is now greyed at 28, frequently sick and a shadow of her beautiful self. She has clung on to her job as her only hope to survive, though courts awarded her monthly rent as maintenance. She must have spent close to thousand hours running around in courts. It has been multiple counseling sessions to make her understand every past mistake of hers. She hates men now and is too scared to choose another man for herself. I believe her when she admits that at 28, she has had no sex and no drinks in last three years. Many men in her office made passes at her but most were either not worthy of her or were just interested in sex without committing. She gets anonymous calls often and that scares her to the bone. She is slowly rebuilding her finances but her father's sickness drains her. Over period of time she has picked up her life a bit. She is looking desperately to get a foreign assignment. She has couple of trusted friends she can cal at midnight for help and they would oblige. She is unable to leave her firm and take job elsewhere so far though she is trying as she has strong feeling that Abhilash has shared his 'exploits' with some colleagues. But being past that phase, its not too bad now.
Sonia devotes her time every week to a NGO that provides legal support and advice to suffering women. She is an excellent counselor. It is revealing to see her understanding of financial, legal, marital and social issues now.
And yet, she dumbfounded me last week.
"Sir, i could not control myself from buying that watch for myself."
"How much did it cost you?" I only knew watches tell time though she was dying to tell me the brand.
"15000."
"Fine. May be you can afford it." I was unsure though if she was mistaken with a zero extra in the figure.
"I am feeling guilty now."
"Return it if so."
"After such a long time I bought something."
"But you have your priorities. At least till you settle in life back again and get basic security of home and job."
"I want to re-marry. But there are not enough good men." she lamented. I was amused thinking she wants to marry for being able to shop. She is still the same Sonia. But I was wrong. She did return the watch and became determined to re-marry. She was too frustrated with her past and also dreadfully looked at a post-30 lonely life of many colleagues.
Where are good men for 30 year old girls wanting to marry/re-marry? I had no easy answers even though 'good' meant just 'reasonable' and not a DiCaprio or Hrithik or SRK ....life goes on for Sonia.
Over to my next blog " 30 plus, Single and working" - the cougar phenomenon, the life of Roshni.
(All posts in this blog are based on real-life personalities and events in my life, suitably moderated and anonymized to protect identities.)
Shudder ! How does one take this slippery road to disaster ? If just reading about this makes me feel like this, I wonder what living all this would be like. Good one. Waiting for the next !
ReplyDeleteI agree and needless to say one wish Sonia has is a rewind button to life. It is a tribute to human spirit though that hope never dies and right now, despite so much having happened, Sonia's mental state is positive.
ReplyDelete